Sometimes I feel as though I’ve lost my identity, everyone else’s lives seem to be moving on and mine is on pause.
Over the weekend I had the pleasure of meeting some distant relatives over the weekend. You know the type, middle aged, married with careers etc. It went something like this:
“Hi Rosey, nice to meet you. What do you do for a living?”
“Well, I’m just a mum”
His response.. A Nod and smile.
Well that was the end of that conversation.
It got me thinking, why did I say “just a mum”.
I’m sure even if I’d have said “I clean toilets”, the conversation would probably have gone a whole lot further.
Why is that?
Why is it that motherhood is some what looked upon as a cop out. I could see on his face that’s exactly what he thought.
Which by any stretch of the imagination is not. Here is why;
– I cook 2-3 times a day, sometimes two separate things whilst simultaneously holding a baby. Most of the time this food ends up in obscure places, meaning it’s a total waste of time.
– I’m constantly hoovering up food crumbs and dried up playdoh.
– I’m forever running around trying to put toys back where they belong. Only to turn around 2 minutes later, to find they are back where they started.
– I spend all day cleaning and tidying…(this probably totals to about 10 hours together).
– I also spend a large majority of the day wiping bums, changing nappies and washing sticky finger prints of the furniture.
– The rest of the day is spent dealing with toddler mega breakdowns over the most barbaric things. For example, giving her the wrong cup, a wet patch on her tshirt and not letting her half eat apples and put them back.
– I breastfeed on demand, which sometimes I’m grateful for because it’s an excuse to sit down. But it isn’t always easy.
…. Oh and I don’t get much sleep either.
I manage to do these things and some.. But I don’t want to bore you. I love my children 24 hours a day, even when I feel like going into hibernation because I’ve had enough. I teach them to the best of my ability (which must be alright, cause they are both pretty clever 😉).
So yeah, I may no longer have much of an identity. And yes, people probably look at me like I’m not doing anything with my life.
But I know I work my arse off, to make sure they have a nice environment to grow and to learn in. More to the point, I spend my life nurturing and loving them.
To those two girls, I am everything.
I am a MUM.. Not just a mum.